It’s been a full year since I linked to all the sketches from Lenny Dee’s Fall ‘08 show, Welcome to Lenny Dee Town. Now another fall show has come and gone, leaving in its wake chuckles a-plenty. Thanks to Henry Moskowitz for use of his camera, my brother Jim for filming, and Nathan Riemer for tripod and putting the video on YouTube. Not coincidentally, you can find links to all the sketches on YouTube just below!

1. I’m a Mac
2. Bros (here titled “Don’t Trust a Bro”)
3. Custody
4. Mario & Order
5. Building a Party (currently only sound, no video… hopefully to be remedied soon)
6. Just Dance
7. Morning Television
8. Happy Hour (same problem as “Building a Party”)
9. One and a Half Men
10. Telekinetic and Telepathic Bros (in the program titled “Telekinetic Bros”)
11. Study Break (again no video)
12. Requiem for a Breakfast
13. Heavily

And the program from the show:

Dee-rector’s commentary to come soon!

12.  A Bunch of Sketches – Bananas bananas bananas! This is one of the few times when we’ve had a series of related vignettes when we don’t disperse them throughout the show (for example, Wolf Andy, Captain Obvious, Gerald Winkler, etc.). The first vignette asks a question that I think we’ve all asked ourselves at one point or another, “Do bananas have butts?” This is Tim’s debut as a bananas on stage, and Laura’s as a (human-headed) gorilla. What happened to the mask? We have no idea. The second features Jae Jae and Lizzie as two laundry-folding stay-at-home (I guess) bananas. It’s interesting that each vignette portrays a different anthropomorphized version of bananas (these two can use their hands, while Tim couldn’t). We finally arrive at the third vignette, where everyone is eating (real) bananas! I have so many, so many bananas, and I fit so much banana meat in my mouth. So much that, when I burst out laughing at Leah on the ground, it all spills on stage! The inside jokes you may have missed:

• The bumper music between each of the vignettes is the theme song for Nannerpus, a delicious-looking food that was in a Denny’s commercial during this year’s Super Bowl. Personally, we think it’s a failure of a commercial in that Nannerpus, which is not meant to be appealing, actually appears to be hilarious, fun, and tasty.
• I’m not exactly sure how you can have a direct view of a banana’s anus without seeing its butt, but I’m not in medical school. Maybe someday.

13.  Apocalypse, Version Y2K(9) – Lenny Dee (alright, mostly me) has always been a huge fan of post-apocalyptic sketch comedy. As far as I know, this is one of the first shows where we’ve actually depicted the Apocalypse. This version grew out of Emogene writing a sketch for John-Michael (which is appropriate and a little cute because he wrote Monitoring the Recession for her) as a robot living during the Y2K(9). I reprise my role as Renegade, in what is perhaps an origin story for the man thriving in the post-apocalyptic future (you would get the reference if you saw Dog Eats Turtle). My favorite moment in this sketch is Tim’s interrupted and awkward entrance onto the scene. The inside joke you may have missed:

• Renegade, I suppose, is the big one. John-Michael’s distinctive lack of a “robot voice” is another. Oh, and the line “How about we make love? It’s the end of the world” inspired Jared, Nathan and I to write a rock opera entitled, or at least containing the song “Let’s Make Love Like It’s the End of the World (‘Cause It Is).”

14.  Surprise in the Dark (Tribute to Hal Edmonson) – Some background is certainly needed here. Hal Edmonson, tech director extraordinaire and all-around great guy has served as some sort of major structural part of the skeleton of Lenny Dee for the last two years, but, being a senior, graduated not long ago. His feats include, but aren’t limited to, finding a Jar Jar Binks mask on eBay, taking care of ridiculous lighting and sound requests, all while serving as a major player in ETB (Experimental Theater Board). The first half of this sketch, involving me searching the dark stage with a flashlight while Laura plays piano, eventually discovering the monstrous visage of Tim Carroll. The latter half was performed one night only, on Saturday. The inside joke you may have missed:

• The flashlight portion of the sketch was originally written to (intentionally) be the least funny sketch Lenny Dee had ever performed. The idea, then, was that Hal would see us rehearsing this, be totally confused and probably a little disappointed in us, and then when we performed the song for him, he would have his mind blown. As it turned out, the flashlight sketch was actually pretty popular, and on the night we sang, Hal couldn’t hear it too well, so we sang it for him again (though slightly more off-key) at the after-party. Irony, right?

15.  Marco, the Sly Hitman from Houston – A sketch written with only a character name/phrase as inspiration (similar to Lenny Dee Town’s Big Chuck Wilmer). It’s a sitcom about a man who, upon losing his job in the recent economic crisis (yeah, we went there), begins killing for money. As it turns out, there’s very little that’s sly about Marco, and much more that’s fatherly and caring. The inside jokes you may have missed:

• This isn’t a joke so much as me bragging, but I recorded and sang the entire “Marco” theme song myself. Three vocal parts, drums, and two keyboards (gotta love that GarageBand).
• A real inside joke: the five gunshots. Keep counting.

16.  Where’s… An Off Day? – This sketch was originally performed in the Spring ‘07 show (whose name may be lost forever, unless someone can find it and bring it to me!). The joke here is that the audience hasn’t, up until this point, seen Waldo’s lower half, which, of course, is pantsless.

17.  She’s Flying High – One of those fleeting, wonderful sketches where what you see is exactly what you get. I have nothing else to say.

18.  Lincoln vs. Darwin – If you’ve watched Bravo in the last few months, you may have come across a show entitled Make Me a Supermodel. A Carleton student, Colin Steers, was a contestant on this season of the show. I’ll admit it, he’s hotter than the average Carl. Turns out, he’s also a pretty funny guy who does a mean (though clean-shaven) Abe Lincoln. This sketch, mostly written by former Lenny Dee member Greg Hunter, was highly relevant this year, the 150th anniversary of both Abraham Lincoln’s and Charles Darwin’s births. I know who my biology roommate Peter was rooting for in this grudge match. One major chnge from Greg’s script was the latent sexist line “…you can’t. ‘Cause you’re a woman.” This was originally a slap in the face toward evolution, calling it a “humbug.” We also added the tortoise, played by Leah, crying over Darwin’s dead body. The inside jokes you may have missed:

• Apparently, origami paper cranes = finches.
• COLIN STEERS CAMEO!!!

19.  That’s Still Wolf Andy! Pt. 3 – Wolf Andy (finally) graduates from Carleton College. Will we ever see him again?

20.  A Complexxx Rap Group – Ever have spirit assemblies in middle school? One of the most memorable ones at mine (Whitman M.S.), was a performance art group: a saxophonist, dancer, and slam-poet performing together. While maybe appropriate for a college-aged liberal arts audience, it totally went over the heads of me and my fellow middle schoolers. To write this sketch, the four of us involved actually spent some time freestyling during one memorable practice. So did John-Michael’s two prospective students that he was hosting, one of whom said something so foul and indecent that it shan’t be repeated here (but if he comes to Carleton, and is interested in Lenny Dee, he’s in fo’ sho’). The sketch also features an appearance by Shaggy, played by Emogene (the second time in this show alone that we have a white woman playing a black man… sort of a reverse White Chicks thing). The inside joke you may have missed:

• Leah, Jared, and I get to play ourselves, while John-Michael plays the socially aware Jake. Emogene, as was stated, plays Shaggy, which actually isn’t that different from her everyday persona.
• Even at the time we performed this sketch, in early May, swine flu was all but forgotten about.

21.  Apocalypse, Version Z – Is it a movie trailer? Is it a love story? Is it Zombies sweatin’ to the oldies? I like to think that this sketch is all of those things, and more. More being fat zombies, too often overlooked in the zombie culture. The inside joke you may have missed:

• The theme from Rocky, played during zombie Tim’s workout montodge, is a reference to last Spring’s (incredibly depressing) musical montage sketch starring Chase.

And with that, another year of Lenny Dee is finished. I probably won’t write a lot on the subject until October again, but I hope you’ll be back, ready to read more about Carleton’s only sketch comedy group. You’re an expert on us now. Join me in a farewell to departing seniors Tim, Leah, Jae-Jae, and Hal. They’ll be missed. Join me in welcoming Jameson as rising Junior Dee-rector. He’s back in America, and back in our hearts. And again, thanks for reading.

Remember how I used to do Dee-rector’s commentary for all the Lenny Dee shows? Well you’re about to make some new memories! …With the third installment of Dee-rector commentary for Lenny Dee, focusing on Lenny Dee: You’re Outta Line, the Spring Term 2009 show. It’s been several months with only a few changes to the Dee’s line-up, so you should have a pretty good i-Dee (pun) of all the members by now. We’ll start with the sketch that wasn’t actually a sketch, but got its own YouTube video:

1.  Dee-Rector’s Intro (Vote for Chase Kimball!) – In which Tim and I introduce the show, but not before passing around a petition to have Chase Kimball on the ballot for CSA Senator (or something like that). A few people asked me if the pie exchange of questions and answers was scripted, and I can assure you that it most certainly was not. It came about as the result of Tim Carroll’s razor-sharp wit. My answer to what it’s like to be Tim was less razor-sharp and more rambling and nonsensical. And then we get the signatures, and we start the show! The inside jokes you may have missed:

• Tim’s favorite Chase story actually has very little to do with Chase, and much more to do with ManZone, a “Northfield community [unintelligible] for men and those who love them.”
• “Chase your dreams. Chase your Kimball.” might be the best campaign slogan ever.

2.  Dee-Rotica (this should be numbered 1., but I’m sticking to the odd system) – This was one of the rare sketches from the past year that was almost completely scripted. It also deals with the economy (but more about porn)! You may notice that Leah’s boom mic is, in fact, a broom stick with a sock taped to it. Jae Jae pronounces “vulnerable” as “vonnerable.” I also think that this sketch makes Tim’s and my homoerotic stage debut. The inside joke you may have missed:

• More of an inside joke you definitely missed: there were actually VHS copies of our real porno available after the show. Yeah. And because you weren’t there, you missed it. Sorry. Maybe next time.

3.  Raised by Animals – This sketch is based on the somewhat shaky premise of having our actors portray feral children all grown up (when Lenny Dee as a group is much more comfortable playing actual animals). I guess the message is that platypi are not only freaks of the animal kingdom, but people raised by them are social pariahs, ostracized not only by human-raised humans, but also animal-raised. And then Emogene comes in with the bear suit. The inside joke you may have missed:

• Nathan continues his tradition of appearing partially nude (for the second sketch in a row, Batman!) during a Lenny Dee show. Also, did you know that he’s not currently a Carleton student? If everything goes according to plan, he’ll probably be around for a grand total of 14, maybe 15 shows. Hot damn.

4.  Where’s… Surgery? – Did you see the Winter ‘08 show, Lenny Dee Presents: Dog Eats Turtle? It was a pretty good one, and this sketch was (nearly verbatim, but with different actors) a part of that show. The original sketch portrayed, as this one does, a frenetic surgery scene, at the end of which, the surgeon in charge asks “Who decided to schedule surgery in Little Nourse [Theater]?!” It was a laugh and a half, but not as good of an opener to the show as we had anticipated. Oh well, right? The inside joke you may have missed:

• Tim kinda looks like Waldo, right?

5.  Room or No Room – Apparently there’s this sort of popular game show where people just have to pick a suitcase from another one and they win money. Personally, I’ve never seen it, but Jared wrote this sketch parodying Carleton’s ResLife actions this year with the game show Deal or No Deal. This sketch is chock full of references to dorms and houses that are available for draw at Carleton. The inside joke you may have missed:

• Sweet Lou’s Waffle Bar and Café (sorry Jared… not a Waffle Haus) went out of business this January. I liked it a lot, but admit that it was a fairly niche market. Waffles. Maybe someday.

6.  That’s Still Wolf Andy! Pt. 1 – Remember Wolf Andy, the hit possibly anthropomorphic wolf student at an unnamed high school from Lenny Dee Goes There? He’s back, and he graduated. And entered Carleton College. He even found friends who are very reminiscent of his friends in high school, although different characters altogether! The inside joke you may have missed:

• Nothing. Wolf Andy is totally accessible and hilarious, right?

7.  Monitoring the Recession – Holy Jones. What a weird sketch. This one went by the development name “Lizard CEO” for the longest time, and it’s one of those sketches that I still have trouble calling by its “show” name. The premise, according to John-Michael, is that Emogene, who usually plays bears (remember?), is also pretty funny in a lizard costume (remember?). The rest, I suppose, is an accurate depiction of just how much Lenny Dee understands the current economic situation. The inside jokes you may have missed:

• The line “Hey Fed Chairman Bernanke!” was written in the script as “He Fed Chairman Bernake!” I like to imagine that it’s still that line, somewhere in the universe.
• I’d also like to order a Lizard Yacht.

8.  Where’s… Chariots of Fire? – Another reappropriation of a Winter ‘08 sketch, which I wrote, and which deals with a grown child-couple who speak solely in transportation euphemisms (“I think it’s time for the H.M.S. Tommy Trolley to roll the f*** out of my house!). And then there’s Waldo, who doesn’t quite seem to know what he’s doing there either. The inside joke you may have missed:

• When Lenny Dee writes domestic sketches, we like to cast parents who could plausibly create the children on stage. In this case, although it isn’t referenced in the sketch directly, within Lenny Dee canon, Mel is adopted. Nyah!

9.  That’s Still Wolf Andy! Pt. 2 – He’s back. He’s got a messenger bag instead of a backpack. And he kills and eats Toff.

10.  Twitter – This whole sketch is an explanation, and an apology, on behalf of Twitter. What you might not know is that over half of Lenny Dee (me, Lenny Dee itself, Jameson, Nathan, Emogene, Jared, Chase, Lizzie, and Dee-lumnus Leah) have Twitter accounts. It’s a constant love-hate relationship, with emphasis on the love. The inside jokes you may have missed:

• Though Jared asks “Who is it?” Tim isn’t on the phone with anyone at all. It’s his hand.
• Laura plays Shaquille O’Neal because she has red hair, which means she’s Irish, and O’Neal is an Irish name, so they’re probably even related, right?

11.  You’re Beautiful – This sketch was one of our first guest sketches in a long time. Evan Franco, campus cool dude who I lived not far from my freshman year, noted that Nathan and I bear more than a passing resemblance (an aspect of our relationship that was noted in the very first sketch of our first term in Lenny Dee, Fall ‘06). But it just so happens that, not only do we resemble each other, but we resemble the physical ideal for humans, male and female alike. Jae Jae and Emogene know this. Now you do too. The inside joke you may have missed:

• Dr. Evan? Dr. Franco? Yup, that’s an Evan Franco reference. Implants everywhere!

Guess what! You’re only halfway done reading the Dee-rector commentary for Lenny Dee’s Spring ‘09 show, You’re Outta Line! Come back soon for the thrilling conclusion.

Two weeks ago, the final Lenny Dee performance of the year was staged, 10 PM each night from the 7th to the 9th. This spring’s show brought two sketches written by Dee outsiders (one a Dee-lumnus), and tons and tons of animal costumes. There weren’t any goat-rabbits in the show, but once our T-shirts get printed, you’ll get to meet the horrid beast that spawned our show’s title: Lenny Dee: You’re Outta Line! As always, Dee member (but currently not Carleton student) Nathan Riemer put our sketches all on YouTube, plus a special feature Dee-rectors’ intro (it took kind of a while, as you’ll see). Watch them now:

1. (but actually 0.) Dee-Rectors’ Intro (Vote for Chase Kimball!)
2. Dee-rotica
3. Raised by Animals
4. Where’s… Surgery?
5. Room or No Room
6. That’s Still Wolf Andy! Pt. 1
7. Monitoring the Recession
8. Where’s… Chariots of Fire?
9. That’s Still Wolf Andy! Pt. 2
10. Twitter
11. You’re Beautiful
12. A Bunch of Sketches
13. Apocalypse, Version Y2K(9)
14. Surprise in the Dark (Tribute to Hal Edmonson)
15. Marco, the Sly Hitman from Houston
16. Where’s… An Off Day?
17. She’s Flying High
18. Lincoln vs. Darwin
19. That’s Still Wolf Andy! Pt. 3
20. A Complexx Rap Group
21. Apocalypse, Version Z

Here’s our program, which highlights Lizzie’s formidable Photoshop skills (she could perhaps compete with Jameson and I someday… someday):

As always, I’ll be returning shortly for insider information, including information about the two mystery non-Dee writers and which sketches they wrote. Keep coming back for more!

The Winter 2009 edition of Lenny Dee-rector’s commentary continues… now.

11. Gerald Winkler Pt. 2 — This scene begins to provide some exposition as to what went down in Pt. 3, the untimely death of Gerald Winkler and several party guests. It’s a dystopic future, not unlike the one portrayed in last winter’s sketch taking place in a post-apocalyptic setting and referencing almost every Will Smith movie ever made. But the only difference is that, in this “totalitarian future-state” of 2042, fondue/fundue is punishable by death. Also, pay attention to how the “Time flies!” banner falls near the end. We planned that! The inside jokes you may have missed:

• The string of profanity that escapes John-Michael’s lips is one of the most insulting, yet simultaneously nonsensical series of words imaginable… in 2042.
• Greg Hunter (Dee member Fall ‘07 and Winter ‘08) makes a cameo, reprising his role as a citizen of this dystopic future, and expressing his frustration about the world in which he lives.

12. That’s Wolf Andy! Pt. 2 — This sketch marks the confluence of the divergent series of vignettes in this show (Wolf Andy progressing normally, Gerald Winkler with reversed chronology). It also introduces the second, but not final, cameo of the show: Brandon Walker. Brandon was forced to audition for Lenny Dee in the fall, and was offered a spot, but declined it. We were very, very pleased that, despite his constant comps-ing, Brandon was able to cameo as the Social Studies teacher (although the video’s description calls him “Professor”… I always envisioned Wolf Andy being in a high school). The inside joke you may have missed:

• Someone in the audience gives Brandon a piece of teaching advice immediately after he asks Wolf Andy about Kennedy’s assassination.

13. Bro-in’ Out — This sketch experienced a number of incarnations throughout the term, beginning with the idea of a guy named “Cliff Hanger” (we were obviously excited about skewing literary terms after DeuSexMachina… I was holding out for “Al Literation”). Early versions were too offensive, or too nonsensical, or not full enough of bros to succeed. The inside joke you may have missed:

• At one point, Henry snaps his fingers (untraditionally) and proclaims, “Bartels!” Andrew Bartels is a recent Carleton graduate whose namesake tradition for some reason includes untraditionally snapping one’s fingers and proclaiming, “Bartels!” I think most students who would have known him have graduated, though. Just friends of friends.

14. Wake Up in Moloch! — Another Peter Kimball contribution to Lenny Dee Goes There. We had a hard time naming this one anything other than “Burning Babies.” The actual title is a reference to Allen Ginsberg’s poem Howl. Ask Tim for more info if you’re genuinely interested, but it has something to do with the deity Moloch? He loves burnt baby sacrifices. The inside joke you may have missed:

• The original ending line, after Laura’s character realizes that we should respect all religions was, “Except for Scientology.” But then they would have come after us.

15. A Wii Bit — Aren’t you glad we didn’t go with the obvious Wii pun of the third-person singular pronoun? Wii are. BAM! The first night of performance (which was not filmed), I entered from offstage in a wheelchair, which Lenny Dee collectively loved, but the audience didn’t seem ready to accept wheelchairs in sketch comedy. I hope they do someday, because Jameson and I are really, really good at doing tricks in wheelchairs now. The inside joke you may have missed:

• “Let’s Get It On” is the only song Lenny Dee will ever use for when people are having sex.
• I’m only about an inch taller than Nathan in real life, but my proximity to the camera makes me look almost as tall as Jameson, who’s 6′6″.

16. That’s Wolf Andy! Pt. 3 — Brandon Walker is back! And better than ever, as he awkwardly announces that “the 2009 Enchanted Under the Sea Prom King, ah… 2009, excuse me, is Wolf Andy!” And that makes it the happiest night of Leah’s character’s surreal, bestiality-driven life. The inside joke you may have missed:

• Riffing? That’s just something we do a lot of in Lenny Dee.

17. F.A.S. P.S.A. — My oh my, that’s a lot of acronym. It’s another Peter Kimball masterwork, short but sweet. And guess who cameos? My little brother, that’s who! He came up for the show and was able to play the part of the second announcer on Friday and Saturday (Nathan performed admirably on Thursday). The inside joke you may have missed:

• Back to the beer bong? Oh yes. It was there the whole time.

18. Gerald Winkler Pt. 1 — Dragonman! Arnold Dragonman! I was so excited about this name. I believe Leah came up with it on the spot, trying to think of names for characters in the aborted Mullet discussion sketch. So in this sketch, you learn everything about Gerald Winkler, right? The clock shop? The dystopic future? Why they had fondue/fundue at his retirement party? It’s so good. We spent so much time and energy making these three vignettes a masterpiece. The inside joke you may have missed:

• The “Time flies!” banner threatened to fall prematurely, but Emogene came to the rescue, like a good assistant.

19. Dusk — Ever read the Twilight series of vampire-based fantasy/romance novels? No? Well, have you seen the film adaptation? Yeah, me neither. However, Lenny Dee as a group was enamored enough with the works to create another sketch comprised of material taken directly from the book’s text. The exceptions to this are the characters names (Edgar and Nella vs. Edward and Bella), and John-Michael’s “shiny, shiny nipples” (not one night of performance could he say that phrase without cracking, just a little bit). The mesh shirt makes a comeback, of course, because vampires wear mesh sleeveless shirts. The inside joke you may have missed:

• Tim suggested the “shiny, shiny nipples” line one or two nights before opening. John-Michael decided that, one of the nights, he would make a reality out of that statement, and put tin foil over his nipples, which was clearly visible through the mesh. It was glorious.

20. The Magic Bathtub — We’ve reached, once again, the finale of the show. And, again, we end with a smashing musical number. This one is a parody of The Magic School Bus, the song written by Leah and me. Originally the concept for this sketch just involved an underwater extravaganza, possibly incorporating every distinctive character from the show (i.e. DeuSexMachina, Wolf Andy). Howard Taft (William Howard Taft) developed with the pun of “Taft Hands” (see Daft Hands, a popular YouTube video created by Carleton student Austin Hall). But when we realized that Taft was the only president to get stuck in the White House bathtub, it became necessary for him to voyage with it under the sea. Jessica having drowned at the beginning of the sketch is inspired by An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge, a delightful short story about death. The inside jokes you may have missed:

• William Howard Taft’s facts progress from true, to false, to opinions, to obviously false, to totally irrelevant, nonsensical ramblings, to getting zapped by a jellyfish. This is appropriately how his presidency progressed in the early 20th century.
• A number of sketches in the past have ended with Leah crying to herself on stage, but I think this is the first show closer where it happens. Hopefully not the last?

Overall, it was a long, hard, but exciting term putting together this show. Jameson Siegert (my Photoshop competitor and prominent Lenny Dee member) is going to be a Dee-rector! He’s going on the CAMS off-campus program this spring, but will be back in the fall and will do great things. I hope you enjoyed this inside glimpse into Lenny Dee, and be sure to check out the spring edition of my Lenny Dee-rector’s commentary.

Welcome to the Winter 2008 edition of the director’s commentary to Lenny Dee. I’ll assume a close familiarity with the sketches, characters, and actors portraying them. What I’ll also assume is that you are so very eager to learn more, that you won’t even bother reading this. So let’s get to the commentary!

1. The Man with the Golden Mullet — One of the new sketch-writing practices we tried this term was a Secret Santa sort of thing. Everyone drew names out of a hat, and when I got stuck with John-Michael, I couldn’t have been happier. I decided not to make a sketch that had a traditional “narrative,” “characters,” or anything that could be considered “coherent.” U2 is played because I was listening to The Joshua Tree while writing the sketch. For a while we had toyed with a follow-up meta sketch involving a panel of experts discussing the meaning of the sketch. It would have included a guy from 1988. Maybe someday… The inside jokes you may have missed:

• John-Michael brings back the mesh tank top later in the show. He made it work.
• You’ll also see Jameson in a white sleeveless shirt similar to the ones on stage very soon…

2. Emogene Cop/Bad Cop — This was Tim’s idea, written specifically for Emogene. The entire structure of the sketch was drastically altered just a night or two before our Thursday opening, when it was decided that Nelson would encounter the little girl on the street, rather than having her explicitly interrogating him as the bad cop’s partner. I had a lot of fun coming up with mixed metaphors for the bad cop to threaten Nelson with. The inside joke you may have missed:

• Recognize those aviator sunglasses?

3. Dex — Written by Jameson specifically for Chase. The sketch explains it pretty well, but you can find an original commercial starring “Dex” here. Dex knows, you guys. He really does. The inside jokes you may have missed:

• Remember Makeout Ridge? Looks like Amanda and her family just might live in Lenny Dee Town…
• Last winter, we had a sketch that ended up being an endorsement for the iPhone. This year, we do once again. Apple needs to start paying us som’thin’ serious.

4. Gerald Winkler Pt. 3 — During the process of putting together Welcome to Lenny Dee Town, I really, really wanted to do a series of vignettes that moved chronologically backward in time, á la Memento. The tragedy of Gerald Winkler was all but written in the fall, and was put off until this term, where I think we really did it justice. The banners in the back read “1995 – 2042″ and “Time flies!” Something very fortuitous happened with the “Time flies!” banner in Pt. 2 the night that this was filmed… watch closely and you’ll see that it all lines up. The inside joke you may have missed:

• Five gunshots. Five of ‘em. The tradition continues.

5. NorDiCorTiSol — Written by Nathan specifically for Jameson, the tallest member of Lenny Dee, and possibly the tallest student at Carleton. Henry plays the ‘before’ to Jameson’s ‘after.’ One thing about Nathan is that he loves penis jokes and he is Jewish. There are elements of both of those in this sketch, and even a joke combining the two. Sven Rolvaag is an actual professor at St. Olaf College (no he’s not). The inside joke you may have missed:

• The technical term for the three young ladies swooning over Jameson’s nordic allure is “mad biddies.”

6. DeuSexMachina — I think Chase brought up the idea for this sketch? It’s fairly straightforward, in that it’s based around a literary term and there’s a lot of sex. We made all the dinosaurs ourselves, and their three-dimensionality is thanks to Emogene’s painting skills. Henry and Leah make awesome German passengers on the Hindenburg, but were a little afraid of physical contact with each other. The German phrase Leah is trying to say is “ficken wir” (look it up). The inside joke you may have missed:

• Anal stimulation via brontosaurus.

7. That’s Wolf Andy! Pt. 1 — Wolf Andy was a character developed through our random two word pairings exercise (along with Gerald Winkler and Rabid Unicorn (more on that soon)). This is what happens when you expect anthropomorphosity where it does not actually exist. There are a lot of drugs at this high school. The extent of Leah’s characters feelings for Wolf Andy? You probably don’t want to know… The inside joke you may have missed:

• “Wolf Andy” spelled backwards is almost “DNA Flow.”

8. To Kill a…? — As previously mentioned, Rabid Unicorn was another two word phrase someone came up with. Chase took the liberty of plagiarizing large chunks of text from Harper Lee’s To Kill a Mockingbird, and Tim Johnson the rabid dog (who, according to Wikipedia, symbolizes racism) became Tim Johnson the rabid unicorn. Finally, for good measure, we threw in Lord Voldemort (in the form of Professor Quirrell). The inside joke you may have missed:

• Leah and John-Michael were made to be adorable child siblings, apparently.

9. Jimmy — Written by the infamous Kimball brothers (revealed later to be mostly Chase’s brother, Peter), you can find an early version on YouTube here, with adorable Fisher-Price figures. Nathan and I play parallel characters, of sorts, in that we both offer Jimmy a lick of our Tootsie Roll Pops (taken from Emogene’s balloons as Emogene Cop). The inside joke you may have missed:

• Chase and Emogene actually each urinate out of their thighs. It’s a serious problem.

10. A Rough Deal — It’s about sweaters, but you thought it was drugs, right? This sketch goes to great lengths to dispel common notions and misconceptions about old ladies, in that they will give you roofied cookies in order to steal your sweater. The inside joke you may have missed:

• John-Michael knows how to fall onstage like a pro.

Come back on Friday, when I’ll detail for you the rest of the show, and you’ll learn just how, when, and where Lenny Dee went there.

A couple months ago, you were welcomed to Lenny Dee Town. It’s a beautiful place, no? I hope you watched all those videos on the edge of your seat, because only then will you be ready for the show Lenny Dee put on last weekend (February 19-21). Our alternate show title in the fall, and our actual show title this winter: Lenny Dee Goes There. I encourage you to watch all of the following videos (over and over again):

1. The Man with the Golden Mullet
2. Emogene Cop/Bad Cop
3. Dex
4. Gerald Winkler Pt. 3 (you read that right)
   
5. NorDiCorTiSol
6. DeuSexMachina
7. That’s Wolf Andy! Pt. 1
8. To Kill a…?
9. Jimmy (here titled “Jimmy the Bad Asker Outer”)
   
10. A Rough Deal
11. Gerald Winkler Pt. 2
12. That’s Wolf Andy! Pt. 2
13. Bro-in’ Out
14. Wake Up in Moloch!
15. A Wii Bit
16. That’s Wolf Andy! Pt. 3
17. F.A.S. P.S.A.
18. Gerald Winkler Pt. 1
19. Dusk
20. The Magic Bathtub

Here’s the Valentine-themed program from the show:

It’s a long show, to be sure. But it’s also well worth your time. In keeping with tradition, I will be bringing you all the inside director’s information that you could ever possibly want. OR COULD YOU?

Also, I got a haircut today. It is a bi-yearly tradition. Also, I think I will be updating Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays from now on. I guess this is pretty big news? Keep reading!

Today we continue the epic saga that is the story behind Lenny Dee Town.

8. Jarley & Jarley — Hal, the tech god, found the Jar Jar mask on eBay not long before the show. Jared had written a Star Wars sketch, but somewhere along the way we decided that we needed a Jar Jar Binks sketch. The overwhelming mundaneness of this one was offset by Tim’s over-the-top (or maybe spot-on) portrayal of the Gungan himself. The inside joke you may not have caught:

• We’re about nine years late with a Jar Jar reference.

9. Bon Bons — What to say that this sketch doesn’t already? I found the funny glasses (which aren’t very easy to see in the video) at Walgreens for two dollars. The script for this one took the longest to get off-book from, and Jameson (the student in and writer of this sketch), Nathan (1st representative), Tim (2nd representative) and I went over it several times every night in the hour before the show started. Originally, Nathan was supposed to have oranges in his hat that would, when he removed his hat, would roll around unrestrained, but they limited his head mobility too much. The inside jokes you may not have caught:

• Carleton students did, indeed, choose Bon Appetit as their new dining services provider.
• My suspenders didn’t snap this time.

10. World War II — I screwed up the “radio” line in this one. It should be much funnier. Henry and Tim play a lovable mother and son, respectively. The inside joke you may not have caught:

• Jared has secured his place as the Dee’s token “old-timey radio voice.”

11. Crime — There wasn’t a whole lot of planning that went into this sketch, but everything came together very nicely in the end. We encouraged John-John (#4) to sneeze on Chase (#3) from backstage, and were very pleased when he did so. The inside joke you may not have caught:

• Actually, this sketch is pretty straight-forward.

12. The Vietnam Conflict — The thrilling conclusion to the end of Captain Riley Obvious’ military career, which spanned several decades. Many Lenny Dee members are actual hippies, especially Jared (lone gunman). The inside joke you may not have caught:

• The “five gunshots” sound effect is a Lenny Dee favorite. We’ve used it in every show for the past year.

13. Jizzle Diamond — A warm-up we sometimes use to come up with ideas, is to write two unrelated words down on paper, in two columns, for two minutes. This brought us such goodies as “Gerald Winkler” (more on him later), “ardent nosebleed,” “bouillon safari,” “biddle baby,” and of course, “jizzle diamond.” Fun fact: Leah (the sexual old lady) had to say the “Herbert Hoover” line in front of her parents Saturday night. That’s commitment! The inside jokes you may not have caught:

• Henry, who was Captain Obvious’ wife, is meant to be the same character in this sketch.
• Jameson did not, in fact, ever finish the Rubik’s Cube. Chase (not in this sketch), on the other hand, can finish one in two minutes.
• In Spring ‘07, there was a sketch where Tim outlined the anatomy of a Lenny Dee sketch to the audience (it was one of the more meta things we’ve ever done). In it, he admitted (indirectly) that Lenny Dee often has abrupt, awkward endings to sketches. This one, I think, is an outstanding example of that.

14. Guns A-Blazin’ — Jared (Rob) had most of this sketch written out himself. I giggle a little bit every time I think of Tim, as a Popeye’s Chicken ad voice, saying “God is dead.” Check out Laura’s hand motions when she asks “Ann Coulter or Sarah Palin?” and her later catch phrase. The inside joke you may not have caught:

• “Grasp ‘n’ glisten” sounds really, really dirty.
• Jared (who pre-recorded the radio lines) reprises his role as FDR.

15. Here At Last — The sketch’s title (as opposed to “Big Chuck Wilmer’s Auto and Body Shop”) refers to the fact that we tried to foreshadow the coming of this sketch as much as possible. Many locations on the map are given in reference to Big Chuck’s (next to Popeye’s, two blocks from Speckler & Speckler). The impetus for this sketch: when I was writing “I Can’t Let You Do That,” I wanted Dave and Amanda to be driving to a funny place. An auto mechanic named Big Chuck sounded appropriate. We decided to write this sketch based on that line. Early ideas had a customer asking Big Chuck why he was called that, and him replying by vomiting copiously (get it? Big Chuck?). Eventually, it was decided that he was only big in comparison to his co-workers, who were British orphans. Leah and John-John are just adorable in these roles, and so knowledgeable about economics. The inside jokes you may not have caught:

• When Nathan and Henry come out for the song at the end, they are both wearing yarmulkes.
• Chase’s current course load somehow always works itself into at least one of our sketches.

So that’s it! I realize I said that I would have more for you nine days ago, so I’ll try to make it up in the upcoming days with lots of pretty drawings and whatnot. In the meantime, here’s the program from our show! Look forward to February, when I’ll give out more secrets and lies from our winter show! Yay!

Yesterday, I promised you “director’s commentary and insider information.” Today, that’s what you’re getting! Hopefully by now you’ve watched all the clips on YouTube and have a reasonably good idea of all the characters, sketches, and recurrent storylines (of which there are many). I’ll include, where necessary, actors’ and writers’ names. Ready? Go!

1. Welcome — A Carleton tradition is Screw Your Roommate night (the Friday of sixth weekend), a.k.a. Set Up Your Roommate. We wrote the mini-sketches you see here separately, incorporating the John McCain/Sarah Palin bit probably two nights before the show. Originally, we had meant to write and choreograph a song/dance number to the tune of “Summer Nights.” The first verse and chorus were written, but sadly, were lost because of the time constraints. The inside jokes you may not have caught:

• Nathan (first sketch, red T-shirt) made a name for himself two years ago for taking his shirt off at parties. It’s a tradition that he does so at least once in every show of ours.
• Equine Outfitters is a store in Northfield that’s tragically going out of business, after a year on Division Street. Their dirty secret? It’s actually a cover for the bondage gear market.
• I have flour in my hair.

2. Above the Influence — A parody of this commercial. Written by Jae Jae, a member of the Dee who took this term off but will be back in the winter. The song is “Smoke Two Joints” by Sublime. The inside joke you may not have caught:

• Neither Nathan nor Chase have ever actually been high, but are good actors.

3. Speckler & Speckler — Written by Henry (who plays the commercial voice in this sketch). One of the few totally scripted sketches, Nathan (Larry) and I (Fred) never performed this one exactly the way it was in the script. Fortunately, most of our lines consisted of various tragic/nonsensical reasons for suing, so there was room for improvisation. The inside jokes you may not have caught:

• Two years ago, Nathan and I were in a sketch portraying twin fetuses (feti?) inside the womb. Is it possible that they were born to a woman named Speckler, and grew up to become Larry and Fred? We may never know…
• Speckler & Speckler’s office is located two blocks from Big Chuck Wilmer’s Auto and Body Shop.

4. I Can’t Let You Do That — I wrote this over the summer, and we revised much of it as a group. The 2001: A Space Odyssey references came to mind only when I realized that I had written a sketch with a sentient machine and a man named “Dave.” Also, every town should have a Makeout Ridge. The reference to Big Chuck Wilmer’s Auto and Body Shop was an original part of this sketch, provided only as a destination for Dave and Amanda. The name was inspirational enough that we eventually wrote an entire sketch based on it. The inside jokes you may not have caught:

• The line “You met me at a very strange time in my life” (0:56) is lifted directly from Fight Club.
• The line “Open the Hyundai doors, pal” (2:34) sounds like “Open the pod bay door, HAL” from 2001: ASO.

5. World War I — Henry (Riley’s superior) provided the idea for Captain Obvious to be an actual military figure, and Jared, Nathan and I (the soldiers in this sketch) wrote the three vignettes depicting his rise and eventual fall. Of course, WWI was not referred to as such in 1917, but we felt it was important to spell it out. The inside joke you may not have caught:

• “Get Back” by Ludacris is a really, really good song.

6. Sweethearts on Parade — Jameson (tall, blonde fellow) wanted a sketch in which the lines were only song lyrics this spring. He didn’t get his wish then, but absence makes the heart fonder, and this fall he brought us a script that was pretty promising. The inside jokes you may not have caught:

• At Carleton, when “Like a Prayer” is played, it’s the cue for everyone present to take off their shirt. This is less an inside joke and more of a rigid, unchanging law for Carleton students.
• Sweethearts on Parade is the actual name of an album released by Lenny Dee (the pop organist, not the sketch comedy group) in the ’50s or ’60s.

7. Wise Old Owl — written by Tim, this is one of the few sketches that changed very little from conception to performance. I play Mr. Bullfrog, Chase plays Wise Old Owl. The inside joke you may not have caught:

• My suspender snapped and I couldn’t fix it. I came up with the line “Picked this up from Mr. Possum. If there’s one thing I always say, ‘If he ain’t lyin’ to you, he’s playing dead,’” on the spot. It doesn’t actually make sense, and I couldn’t use Mr. Possum for my next line, so I also made up Mr. Garter Snake. He don’t bite none.

This is a lot of words, so I’ll leave you with this map of Lenny Dee Town (actually Cal Tech, but Photoshopped) and the promise of more to come tomorrow.

Our show, Welcome to Lenny Dee Town, (also tentatively titled Lenny Dee Goes There), just finished its three-day run this weekend at the renowned Nourse Little Theater. I wrote about Lenny Dee in a previous post, but had nothing to offer you in the way of ultra-new, ultra-exciting things. This has all changed! Courtesy of Nathan Riemer (for creating the YouTube channel) and Eric Handler (filming), we now have Welcome to Lenny Dee Town in all its glory on YouTube. Here are links to all the sketches (in show order):

1. Welcome (here titled “Screw Dates,” also “Screw Dates and Deerectors’ Welcome”)
2. Above The Influence
3. Speckler & Speckler
4. I Can’t Let You Do That (here titled “GPS Trouble”)
5. World War I (here titled “Rise Through the Ranks #1: World War I)
6. Sweethearts on Parade
7. Wise Old Owl
8. Jarley & Jarley (here titled “Jar Jar at Home”)
9. Bon Bons (here titled “The Truth About Bon Appetit”)
10. World War II (here titled “Rise Through the Ranks #2: World War II)
11. Crime (here titled “Lineup”)
12. The Vietnam Conflict (here titled “Rise Through the Ranks #3: The Vietnam Conflict)
13. Jizzle Diamond (here titled “Old People”)
14. Guns A-Blazin’ (here titled “Catch Phrase”)
15. Here At Last (here titled “Big Chuck Wilmer’s”)

Director’s commentary and insider information coming tomorrow! Also, here’s the poster, designed by me and Lisa:

This was the design I submitted for my sketch comedy group, Lenny Dee. For those who aren’t familiar, it’s supposed to be Anton Chigurh, played by Javier Bardem, villain of the Coen brothers’ 2007 film No Country For Old Men. Lenny Dee doesn’t have much to do with Chigurh, except that we all find him pretty badass and thought that it would be great to have such an intimidating face on our T-shirts, especially for the annual sketch comedy vs. improv softball game.